- Previously on The O. C: - She came back...
...so I guess you're going home.
- You're his mother. - I'm a mess, not a mother.
- You can't walk away. - This way he ends up with a real mom.
It's sweet that you're concerned about this boy...
...but you need to focus on the future, which means Luke.
She chose you. You're the one she wants.
- I wanna sail to Tahiti. - You're taking this to Tahiti?
- How much do you need? - It's $100,000.
The check that you guys gave Jimmy. We needed that 100 grand.
- Ryan's gonna stay with us now. - Awesome.
We just got in way over our heads.
- Oh, really? You think so? - I do.
We'll see about that, monkey pox.
So the pupil has become the teacher.
- Hey, guys. - Hey.
Who died?
Seth, we need to talk to Ryan.
Okay.
If this has to do with the rug, I want to say that Ryan had nothing to do with it.
What about the rug?
I'm gonna go now.
So...
Kirsten and I went to Child Services this morning...
...and we told them that we want you to stay with us.
But there's a catch. Because you're a minor...
...the only way they're gonna allow that to happen...
...is if we assume all legal responsibility for you.
- I can't ask you guys to do that. - You don't have to. We're asking you.
We've all talked about it, and we want to be your legal guardians.
We want you to be part of the family.
If you wanna be.
What if it doesn't work?
Well, how do you mean?
What if something happens and you guys change your mind?
Like what?
You steal a car? You burn down a house?
You beat up the captain of the water polo team?
Those ships have sailed, my friend.
You have to promise us you'll stay out of trouble. From now on, no more fights.
You're still on probation, and Child Services will be up our ass all the time.
No more trouble. I promise.
Well...
- Welcome to the family. - Thanks, guys.
Okay, Seth. You can come out now.
You knew about this and didn't say anything.
I didn't wanna jinx it.
Dude, you're a Cohen now.
Welcome to a life of insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.
Yeah. Now all I have to do is stay out of trouble.
Yeah, that could be...
...difficult.
You're gonna need bedding and towels.
How's the bed, Ryan? Is it comfortable?
Yeah, it's...
It's fine. It's great.
We want you to have your privacy, but it's a pool house. It needs warmth.
You'll need chairs and a desk, a bookshelf...
Plasma flat screen, a couple of turntables, minibar.
And we should clean all this out so that you have room for some of your...
Right, you don't have stuff, so we have to buy clothes, shoes and underpants.
Mom, don't say "underpants."
I've got everything I need. Really.
I bet you don't have a tux. Because you're gonna need one.
- For what? - For cotillion.
It's the annual debutante ball. It's Newport's biggest event.
Until whatever's next week.
It's the day when Newport's most accomplished young women...
...make their debut into society.
Or another excuse for them to get wasted and throw up.
I was a deb. I made my debut at this very country club not so many years ago.
- The year was... - Hey, watch it.
You know what?
- Maybe I should skip it. - You have to go.
It's a family tradition. And you're part of the family.
- Hello, dear. - Hi, Peggy.
- How are you? - I'm good.
- How's it going? - It will be fine.
- The fitting area's back there. - Thank you.
Come on, boys. It'll be fun.
Sandy.
Hey, Jimmy.
Got some surfing in, huh?
Late court date. Gotta take advantage.
I used to have hobbies.
Look, I know you're not thrilled with me.
When I borrowed the money from Kirsten, I should have asked you.
- I wasn't going behind your back. - Look, it's done. Let's move on.
I was afraid of what you'd think of me.
Losing as much money as I have...
...is not an impressive accomplishment.
- How much money did you lose? - Look...
It's not important.
- How'd you lose it? - The important thing is...
...I don't know what Julie and I would do without friends like you and Kirsten.
So everything's okay?
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Thank you.
- I'll see you around. - See you.
Okay, pick whatever you want. We have Gucci, Armani. Versace's there.
Hi, I'm picking up for Marissa Cooper.
- Hey. - Hey.
What are you doing here?
I...
...had an appointment with my personal shopper.
But I thought you said you were leaving with your mom.
It didn't really work out, so I'm kind of living with the Cohens.
- For good? - Is that...
...gonna be a problem? - No, no. It's great.
I mean, I guess now we can be friends, right?
Hey, Coop.
These gloves are giving me serious sausage arms.
What are you still doing here? I thought you were going back to Chino.
- I had a change of plans. - Ryan's living here now.
- He's what? - Look, I'm not here to cause problems.
Is everything all right?
- I'll be in the truck. - Great.
Marissa, I was gonna call you. Since you're lead deb...
Seth?
I wanted to introduce you to a couple of white knights.
In case any of your girls needed a last-minute escort.
- Okay. - Every girl needs a white knight.
Seth Cohen, white knight.
So you'll be at the rehearsal?
Yes, absolutely.
See you then.
Bye.
Cotillion rocks.
You want me to fix you up with Ryan? I thought you said he was a "psycho."
- That was before I got to know him. - When did you get to know him?
Just now.
Plus there's that whole brooding bad-boy thing.
He's wounded. I can save him.
Have you ever really talked to him? He's not really a bad boy.
Well, he will be by the time I get through with him.
What? You're not, like, into him, are you?
- I mean, you're with Luke, right? - Right.
Good.
Sandy Cohen?
I'm with the Securities and Exchange Commission, Enforcement Division.
Okay.
I was hoping you could help me out with a case.
Sure. What can I do for you?
Were you aware, Mr. Cohen, that a check your wife made out...
...to a James Cooper for $100,000 was not treated as an investment...
...but as a deposit into his personal account?
It wasn't an investment. It was a loan. My wife and Jimmy are old...
- What's this about? - Did you know Mr. Cooper is...
...the subject of an SEC fraud investigation?
No.
No, I didn't.
Hey. White gloves, ready for a comeback.
Hey. What are you doing home?
Fellas, do you mind?
- If this is about the vase... - Which vase?
Nothing. Let's go, Ryan. Come on, buddy.
What's going on?
Okay. So...
I think I'm not going to cotillion.
Yeah, okay. Except that you are.
I made a promise to your parents that I'd stay out of trouble.
It's a debutante ball. What trouble can you get into?
Why don't you ask Luke.
Ryan, we're white knights, okay?
That means Marissa probably already has some sad, Ionely girl...
...lined up for you to escort, so you can't cancel at the last minute.
That's a faux pas, buddy.
- Would you call her? - No.
If you're gonna bail on Marissa and some poor, pathetic, dateless girl...
...you'll just have to do that one yourself.
Are you sure?
These guys say Jimmy's been siphoning money out of his clients' accounts...
...to cover his own debts.
- How could we not know this? - Because we trusted him. Everybody did.
This entire community wrote him blank checks. You gave him 100 grand.
It was just a loan.
Which, according to the SEC, makes us worth investigating too.
I'm gonna be sick.
I'm gonna have to call our friends and let them know.
Sandy, wait. You're just gonna panic people.
Don't do anything until I talk to him, okay?
Put your feelings for him aside. Forget about your history.
He's one of my oldest friends.
If it's true, I just need to hear it from him.
I'm coming.
Hey. You're...
...at my house. - I...
Well, I wanted to talk to you about cotillion.
Oh. Okay, well...
I was just trying this on, and I can't seem to reach the...
Did you want me to...?
I could... Do you want me to...?
Yeah. You know, actually, if you wouldn't mind.
Thanks.
So, what's up with cotillion?
What time did you want me there?
I'm... I'm so sorry.
I never meant for you to be dragged in like this.
How did this happen? I understand a couple of bad investments, but theft?
- Theft? No, no. - Okay, honey, so we're gonna...
- Oh, Kirsten. - Julie.
- Jimmy didn't say you were coming by. - She just had a quick business question.
- A quickie, huh? - Julie.
I'm kidding. So we're off. Kaitlin needs new shoes for cotillion.
Then we're test-driving the CLK, then I have to re-up Marissa's tennis lessons.
- So which credit card should I use? - The MasterCard.
- What about the Amex? - No, don't use the Amex. The...
Get the miles.
Okay.
You two have fun.
Well, now that the how and why have been accounted for...
Look, I was not stealing. I was borrowing to pay back my debts.
And then the market took a turn, and there we are.
You were stealing.
I... I can't say no to my family. I'll pay everything back.
- I just need that one stock. That one. - Jimmy, you need help.
Yeah, well, who's gonna help me?
So, what exactly happens at this rehearsal?
Just stupid cotillion stuff.
Bowing and curtsying.
One, two, three. One, two, three.
Try to enjoy this, please.
Dancing? You didn't tell me there was dancing.
Well, if I'd told you there was dancing, I'd be here by myself.
Because I really...
...don't dance.
Neither do I. I just move well.
Want me to teach you that one?
- Maybe later. You ready? - Take your places.
Hey, guys. So can I introduce you to your debs?
We've already met.
Oh, well, actually, Summer, Ryan's already been promised to someone else.
You gave him to someone else?
Who? Who's pathetic enough not to have a date the day before cotillion?
Actually, at this point, that would be you.
So, Anna Stern, this is Ryan Atwood. Anna just moved here from Pittsburgh.
Pittsburgh?
Can we just get this over with?
Caliente.
- Hey, it's not that bad. - You haven't seen me dance.
Well, I can help you.
So, like, what am I supposed to do?
Over here.
Fine. Let's go.
Are you sure? Because if you're not...
Just don't talk to me.
All right, I get it. Our... Our connection's deeper than words.
That's it. I'm done. I'm sorry. Chock-full of quiet now.
Okay. So you guys will be over here.
If you want to, go ahead and get into waltz position.
Which means, Anna, you put your left hand on Ryan's shoulder.
No, not like that. Here, watch.
Okay? Now, Ryan, you put your right hand on my back.
Lower.
Okay. Good.
Good.
I'd be pretty jealous right now...
...if Chino wasn't gay.
- Luke. - What? No, it doesn't bother me.
He was born that way, right?
Thanks. I think we can take it from here.
Okay.
You're into her, huh?
Man, are you in trouble.
- I know. - Yeah.
- Come on.
All right, darlings, listen up.
Let's review the classic waltz step. Phillip?
And...
One, two, three.
One, two, three. Smile, please.
- That kid is stalking you. - He is not. He's my neighbor.
And he's not going anywhere, so get used to him.
What I'll never get used to is that kid macking on you when I turn my back.
So you don't trust me?
No, I...
I don't trust anybody else. Not around you.
- Wait. - Slow down.
Are you the kid from Chino who steals cars...
...and sets people's houses on fire?
You're saying I'm making my debut into society with Newport's most wanted?
- Is that gonna be a problem? - I can't wait.
Absolutely not.
As happy as I am that you came all the way out to my office to visit me...
...the answer is no.
Corey! I need that file on Nerodner v. Caplin.
- And I need the INS report on my 4:30. - Yes, sir.
I got a two-time drug offender they want to deport. 15 years old.
Sandy, he needs help.
Jimmy Cooper? He stole from his clients, he stole from his friends...
...and then he had the nerve to borrow $100,000 from us to cover it up.
He was trying to provide for his family.
Yeah. Boats, ponies...
- You'll defend a drug offender, but...? - Yes.
My clients are kids who have no hope, no guidance, nothing.
Jimmy Cooper is just another spoiled Newport brat...
...who had everything handed to him.
- Like me. - No. Not like you.
You would never lie. You would never steal.
I'd like to think that, but the truth is...
...there isn't anything that I wouldn't do for my family.
See you at home.
- Three hours of dancing. - I feel like I could go for three more.
Ryan. So Anna seemed nice.
I mean, I just figured she's new and you're new, so...
- Yeah. - Great. Good.
Holl, I was about to tell them about the cookout tonight.
It's at my house. I do it every year for cotillion.
- You didn't do it last year. - Yeah, we did.
Ouch.
- See you tonight. - Bye.
See you there.
You really think that's such a great idea?
Yeah, I do.
You're living here now, and there's no reason why we all can't hang out, right?
- I can think of a reason. - Yeah. I'm not going.
- I don't want to go alone. - Summer will be there.
Yeah, I'm still going. I would just prefer not to go alone. Listen to me.
We're like brothers now, okay? That means we do stuff for each other.
If you do this for me, later on I'll be able to do something for you.
I don't know what it's going to be yet, but it's gonna be awesome.
Please?
Okay, here we are. Thank you very much. Okay.
Here we go, sweetheart. Make sure we got everything.
Hey, Jimmy Cooper. Just the man I wanted to see.
- Hey, Greg. Hey, Holly. - Hey, Mr. Cooper.
Somebody's having a party.
Holly's hosting this thing for the debs out at the beach house.
That's right. Marissa's going. Have a good time.
Honey, take these down to the car. I'll be right there. Okay?
Hi, I'm picking up for Cooper.
Listen, Jimmy. I haven't heard back from you. Did you get my messages?
Yeah, I'm sorry.
You know, work has been so crazy. But what's going on?
I've been asked to invest in a commercial real-estate property.
It could be a nice second income for us.
It might be our only income, the way the pharmaceutical industry's going.
- That sounds promising. - Yeah.
So we're gonna have to pull $250,000 out of the investment account.
Are you sure you wanna do that, with the market about to turn around?
Sir? I'm sorry, but your credit card's been declined.
Oh, it's a new card, and I forgot to activate it.
Did you want to use another card?
Dad, I'm gonna be late to my own party.
Okay, honey.
I'll call you tomorrow about the details. Just bring the check to the cotillion.
Enjoy your meal.
I'll just pay with cash.
Give me 10 minutes to find Summer, lock it down for tomorrow.
See where the night takes me.
- Better take you back here in 10 minutes. - Don't wait up.
Come on. Two Jack Johnson tickets, a massage at Burke Williams...
...and all the money I have on me, which is $11.
Sorry, Summer, I don't want to trade escorts.
- Hey, Summer. - What did I say about talking to me?
Okay. I just wanted to make sure we're still on for tomorrow night.
I guess.
Could you even pretend to be a little bit stoked?
Fair enough.
You're a really good barbecue-tionist.
There it is.
Oh, jeez!
You lost a bet. You lost a bet. You've got to pay up.
You sure you want to be seen with me?
Hey, I'm glad you came. I mean, how could you possibly miss all this?
- I'm gonna go. - Hey, we're not doing anything wrong.
Well, now that you've moved in, I see you're making yourself right at home.
Luke, come on. You said you were gonna try.
I'm trying. I'm trying to understand why there's all these people here...
...and you only want to talk to her. - Hey, I wanted to talk to him.
Look, babe, why don't you go talk to Summer, all right? She looks Ionely.
Or you can, and I'll finish talking to Ryan.
No, it's okay. I'm just gonna go.
- No. Stay. - What are you doing? Don't tell him that.
- Don't tell her what to do. - I thought you were leaving.
Why don't I just help you out.
I'm not gonna fight.
- Even if I do this? - Luke!
Oh, God. Are you okay?
God, Luke, you're such an idiot.
You just got your butt kicked and didn't fight back. Dude, you really are a Cohen.
Yeah. Let's get you home.
What are you doing? Why aren't you dressed yet?
I'm not going. Would you let Anna know? She'll probably be relieved.
Are you not going because you're afraid of Luke?
That's not what I'm afraid of.
Look, your parents taking me in is the greatest thing that's happened to me.
I'm not gonna lose it just to kick some guy's ass.
- You could totally kick his ass, right? - Oh, yeah.
Cool.
All right. Well...
...have fun.
Sweetie, I need to borrow your lip gloss.
Oh, I love this dress.
Really? Maybe you should wear it.
You're sweet, but I think we both know I'm no longer a size 0.
Give me a few more months on the Zone.
I don't think I want to go.
I'm sorry, I thought I heard you say you don't want to go to your own cotillion.
Look, Luke and I got in a fight last night, okay?
So you got into a fight. You've had fights before.
You guys have been together forever.
Maybe that's the problem.
I mean, what if there's someone else out there?
Like who? That boy from Chino?
Do you want to end up like Aunt Cindy, with four kids in a trailer park?
She broke my mom's heart. You won't break mine.
- So now this is about you? - No, sweetie, it's about you.
- What future is there with that boy? - Mom, I'm 16.
The choices you make when you're 16 can affect your entire future.
Luke is from a good family. If you stay with him, you'll always be comfortable.
- I'm comfortable now. - Nothing in life is certain.
- What does that mean? - It means you'll put on this dress...
...do your hair like I showed you and make your debut into society with Luke.
I can't.
I'm sorry.
No, you're not.
But you will be.
What are you doing? Why aren't you dressed?
- I'm not going. - What do you mean, you're not going?
I don't feel like getting dressed up...
...and pretending Jimmy Cooper is the O.C. Golden boy.
And any community that makes that guy a hero is not one I feel like being part of.
You're not going either?
- I wanted to leave 20 minutes ago. - Let's go.
- Dad, why aren't you...? - Seth. Now.
I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't go either.
What? What is wrong with this family?
This is cotillion, the most important event of the year.
Am I the only one who gets it?
I get it, Mommy.
Daddy, it's Mr. Fisher again. He's called, like, three times.
No. We do not have time for you two to talk business.
Tell Greg Daddy will see him at the cotillion. Right, Jimmy?
All right.
Come on. We don't wanna be late.
You guys know Anna Stern?
Seth.
Wow.
- You think? - Yes...
...I do. Which makes this even harder to say.
Anna, just know that, in life, there are peaks and...
Ryan's not coming, is he?
Kind of took the wind out of my sails there, but yes.
- Are you okay? - I'll survive.
- Hey. - Hey.
- Thought you were going to cotillion. - I thought you were.
Yeah. No.
Yeah, me neither.
- Which one's sword? - Not the one you're hitting.
- Got it. - Okay, now you're stabbing me.
Just don't touch any of the buttons. Follow me through the forest...
...and maybe we'll both make it out of here alive.
So you didn't feel like going, huh?
Yeah. No, not really for me.
What? Waltzing and orchids? What could be more you?
Guess I don't really fit in, huh?
Oh, I got news for you. Nobody does.
I guarantee you every single person at that cotillion feels like a fraud.
They've all got secrets, and they're all terrified the neighbors will find out.
What's your secret?
Sometimes, when the sun's coming up and the surf is good...
...and I haven't pissed my wife off quite as much as I have today...
...I kind of like this place.
You just stabbed me again.
Sorry.
I can't believe you're not coming.
It's just after the whole Luke and Ryan thing last night, I don't feel...
Coop...
...Ryan isn't even here.
He's not?
Yeah, well, even so.
I'm just not up for it.
She's not coming.
So, what did I get all dressed up for?
I mean, whatever you think about the whole superhero movie genre...
...at least people are now reading the source material.
I cannot believe that you read comic books. I mean, you're a girl.
What's that supposed to mean? And I call them "graphic novels."
In fact, if more people did, maybe the form wouldn't be so marginalized.
I couldn't agree more.
Summer, are you ready? You look just great.
So listen...
You...
...found another date. - Yeah.
It's kind of an emergency, but you're off the hook.
- Sorry. - No, that's...
That's fine.
- Hey. - Hey.
You're not at cotillion.
Neither are you.
Look, I hope you didn't not go because of last night or...
...because of me.
How come you're not going?
So you think hiding out, staying home is gonna make everything better?
Seems to be working for you.
I'll go if you go.
Ryan, come on. Check this out. I have totally annihilated all the other ninjas.
I'm already on to the...
Marissa. Hello.
Hey.
So we're gonna go.
To cotillion.
I'll get the car.
Hey, Jimmy, there you are.
- Greg, how you doing? - I'll be better once I get that check...
...get this property deal closed, get my wife off my back.
- I don't have it. - What do you mean? Did you forget it?
This isn't the time or place. Stop by the office tomorrow, and we'll talk about it.
Talk about it? Talk about what?
- Excuse me. - Jimmy...
I don't believe it.
You told Summer you weren't coming. Now you're here with him?
- Ryan and I aren't here together. - I'm not an idiot.
Then listen to her and stop acting like one.
What did you say?
- Forget it. - No, what did you say? Come on, man.
Luke, stop it.
I'm over this. We're done.
Hey, look who decided to show up.
Don't worry, your hit man already took care of it. I didn't feel a thing.
I'm here now, if you want to...
No, too late. You missed your shot.
I guess you'll have to go with Princess Mononoke over there.
- And what are you gonna do? - Oh, so now you care? Go.
Marissa, if you'd just stuck to the original plan...
- Sorry. Do you want Daddy to go find...? - No, Mom.
- You can't debut without an escort. - I hear there's a white knight available.
Well, that's very nice of you to offer, but I don't think it's appropriate.
I'll go get dressed.
Could you be any more pathetic?
A Ione figure sitting on the floor...
...wondering if he'll be Ionely for the rest of his life.
Hey, your sensitivity, it's really...
...nonexistent. - You know what your problem is?
You're not a man.
Again, not appreciating the brutal honesty.
Do you know what girls find sexy?
Nope. Wait, let me guess.
- Dudes who play water polo. - Confidence. Watch this.
- Seth? - Yes?
I don't have a date to the cotillion.
Would you be my escort?
I mean...
Confidence, Cohen.
Let's do this.
Hair's good, makeup's good. Very nice. Stand up straight. Gum, please.
How did this happen?
How did I go from having three dates to cotillion to having none?
I'm sorry, girl. That blows.
Good news. I'm available again.
You are?
No. No. We're gonna go this way. No.
Five hundred channels and nothing on.
You couldn't put on a tux?
Pick your battles, honey.
Good evening, everyone.
And welcome to the 47th annual Newport Beach Debutante Cotillion.
Hey.
Are you ready to make your debut?
Holly Fisher, daughter of Greg and Marianne Fisher.
Anna Stern, daughter of Cameron and Patricia Stern.
Marissa Cooper, daughter of James and Julie Cooper.
- I love you, kiddo. - I love you too, Daddy.
And now, ladies and gentlemen...
...please join me in congratulating this year's debutantes.
We never finished our conversation.
I gotta tell you, you got me a little concerned.
Believe me, it's nothing that can't wait until tomorrow.
Don't the girls look beautiful?
I hate dancing.
Thanks.
No, with you, it's...
It's not horrible.
You're sweet.
- Are you leading? - I'm trying.
Attitude. I like that.
I've put in an offer. I got a mortgage, the kids are in private school.
If there's a problem, I need to know.
Now is not the time.
Jimmy, where's my money?
I asked you a question. Where's my money?
I didn't want you to find out this way, but I don't have it.
- What? - I will, but I don't have it right now.
- If you don't have my money, who does? - Hey, look.
I promise I'm working on it, all right? There's been some bad investments.
Are you telling me you lost everything?
Would you just keep it down?
I won't keep it down. That is my money. My retirement, my kids' tuition!
- I'm sorry. - Son of a bitch!
- Oh, my God. - You're a thief! You took my money!
Greg!
I want my money back, you hear me?
Get off me!
You're a thief! You're a thief!
- Get off me. - Go outside.
- He's a thief! You're a thief! - Leave. Please.
- Come on. - He's a thief!
Dad!
Take it outside. Come on.
I haven't seen you in a fight since...
...ever. - Now you know why.
What are you talking about? He sucker-punched you.
You didn't have to jump in like that, defend Jimmy.
Well, I've always had this thing for the underdog.
After I fill out the police report, maybe we should go and see how he's doing.
Hi.
So, sorry. I know I promised I wouldn't get into any fights.
We can make an exception in this case.
The police, however, will have questions. As your attorney, I advise you...
...get out of here. - Thanks.
Hey.
You don't mind if I walk your date home, do you?
- No. - Cool.
That's quite a debut you had tonight. You know how to present yourself.
Finally, a Cohen who can throw down.
You wanna come with us?
- I'll just see you at home. - See you at home.
So do you think that I'll get to see you again?
- No. - Okay.
No, it's just...
I know this might sound kind of...
...whatever...
...but I'm spending the rest of the summer on a sailing trip.
To Tahiti.
- You like sailing? - Yeah.
You okay?
What happened in there?
I don't know.
What's gonna happen now?
I don't know.
Come on, let's go.
Come on.
Came as soon as I heard.
Are you...?
I'm sorry.
Can I take you home?
- We could talk, maybe. - I...
I just need to be alone right now.
Thanks.